Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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