Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
