His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
My life is pants optional.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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