question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
