No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
