garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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