i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Randomize
