what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize