i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
