She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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