I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize