Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
He did a backflip because drugs
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
