so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
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she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
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You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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