WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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