I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
