do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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