all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Randomize
