i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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