those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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