are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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