Your tits are I can't wait for
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
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