they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
pray to the hookup gods
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Randomize
