i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
