He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Randomize
