Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
