I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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