We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
