I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
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