i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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