The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
As shirtless as possible
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
