we're blogging at a bar
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
The beer is more important than you right now.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize