Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
