just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
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If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
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how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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