I'm going to rape someone's good day.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
