I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
this will be a night to untag.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Randomize
