just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
i think im in europe. pls send help
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
