i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Randomize
