I love black thongs
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
