Don't you send me to vm
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Randomize
