I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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