also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Randomize
