So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
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