I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
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