Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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