He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize