I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
He told me they were just razor bumps!
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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