I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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