I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
