for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize