So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
